


Where There's a Monster, There's a Moral

by Batwynn



Category: Frostiron - Fandom, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Confessions, Fear, Loki Feels, M/M, Marvel Norse Lore, Tony Feels, loki tells the truth, norse lore, so Loki can rule all the realms, someone needs to shit gold
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-07
Updated: 2014-03-07
Packaged: 2018-01-14 22:57:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1281850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Batwynn/pseuds/Batwynn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony settled in to listen to Loki as if it were story time.</p><p>Perhaps it was, for Loki suspected his tale would be much like many of the mortal’s children stories. There was the monster, the heroes, and the moral.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Where There's a Monster, There's a Moral

**Author's Note:**

> 3am drabble :V

"Tell me."

"I refuse."

"I told you everything, even the bad parts. Be fair," Tony admonished.

Loki gave him a dry look and leaned away from him, allowing the cold air to sneak in between their bodies. The blanket slithered off his shoulders as he shifted to face Tony from the opposite end of the couch.

It was a rather obvious escape, but Stark was not leaving him with many options. It was either stay close and be pushed away, or push himself away before he suffered the pain of the former option. His lover settled with his back against the other arm of the couch and tucked the blanket in around him as if it were story time.

Perhaps it was, for Loki suspected his tale would be much like many of the mortal’s children stories. There was the monster, the heroes, and the moral.   
  
“I don’t suppose you know where I should start? It has been a long thousand years or more.”

"I would say skip to the good parts," Tony spoke and gave a sad smile, "but, you know…"

"Yes, I do."

He watched Stark’s eyes carefully as he sorted his thoughts. There was only one outcome of this midnight story telling, and Loki wished for it to never come.

"I cannot tell you where my life began, or who gave it to me. I never knew my mother and my short-lived reunion with my father ended in blood and no tears. The only story I was ever told of that time, was of abandonment." Loki gritted his teeth and glanced away from the worried, amber eyes in front of him. "Odin told me I was left, like a piece of garbage, in some temple. I do not know what is true, and what are lies. Perhaps he was wrong, and I was there for another reason. Perhaps my mother fled in fear, and made a mistake in leaving me."

Loki met Stark’s eyes again and continued bitterly, “or, perhaps, I _was_  abandoned. Left to be killed by the mighty Asgardian armies. Either way, I was not a Frost Giant, nor an Aesir. I was apart from each, and alone for it.”

"I suppose time went by rather peacefully as I grew up," Loki continued, chuckling as Tony raised a questioning eyebrow. "As peaceful as it could be with Thor and myself on the loose. We were terrible children, I must admit. But for all the trouble we caused, Thor rarely got  _in_ trouble for it. He held no responsibilities for his actions, and therefor felt no regrets for them either. Once, he nearly killed a market woman as he rode a wild boar through the streets. The healers were called immediately, but the golden prince was ushered away. He never apologized. In fact, years later, he and his friends would remark on the memory fondly. As if it were all a big joke, a play put on for their amusement.”

Tony made a sound in the back of his throat and shook his head. Waiting for his usual string of comments, Loki paused in his story. They blinked at each other for a moment. When nothing more came, Loki began again with a faint frown.

"I never hated him, not really. Distrusted him, loathed his methods, even jealousy? Yes… I felt all of these. As the years grew long, things changed between us. He laughed less at my pranks, and more at my failings. I laughed less at his poor jokes, and more at his hurt pride. We smiled at one another, hugged and laughed, but it had a bitter edge to it that neither of us would admit to. The final straw was…" Loki froze, his mouth open to say the next words. He couldn’t. Stark didn’t need to know that. No… he had said ‘everything’. Even the  _bad parts_.

"The last and final thing that drove us apart, was the death of my child, and the banishment of the others."

Tony, who had began to fidget slightly at the other end of the couch, went completely still. Loki saw his eyes change from simply listening to rapt attention. There was a terrible guilt there that Loki didn’t expect to see. It was not all that surprising, he supposed. Stark was always the type of man to take on other’s pain. Another reason Loki had not wanted to share his past.

"I refuse to go into detail on the matter," Loki carried on, looking down at his hands. "A son died, and the rest turned to monsters. It is almost fitting, thinking of it now. Monsters borne of a monster."

“ _Don’t._ ”

Loki shook his head and ignored the pleading tone in that single word. “I speak only the truth. They changed into creatures Odin would not abide in his kingdom, so he cast them out. I wish, to this very day, that he had banished me with them.”

"But no… I was left alone in a land of traitors. My wife and I did not survive our family being torn apart. Thor was absent from my side, and I felt something inside of me start to whither and die."  
Loki cleared his throat and pulled his knees up to his chest. He was coming to the part that changed everything. The part that could change his life again, should Stark hate what he heard. He would hate it, Loki knew.

"I ruined things, from then on. I found a small, sick pleasure from watching their discontent faces. Sif’s hair was hilarious, as was Thor’s face when he saw what I did to his room time and time again. Fandral made a beautiful bird for a month before my mother figured it out." Loki chuckled at the memory and gave Tony a small smile before continuing, "it was all nonsense. Nothing of meaning, precisely how I intended it to be. I simply could not focus anymore, not after such a heavy loss. Soon, I was better known for my pranks than ever and hated all the more by those who already harbored doubts about my character. Then… it began. It was time for Thor’s coronation by the king, and every single person there knew it was too soon. Did anyone say as much? Of course not. They cheered and smiled and congratulated the petulant child who was about to become our king. So, it was up to me to try to change it."

"Ah… this is when Thor got the boot, isn’t it?"

"Banished. Ironic, is it not?"

"Hilarious," Tony replied dryly.

Loki gave him a sweet, sarcastic smile and leaned back. “You know a little of this, I suppose, so I shall spare you the details. I let the Frost Giants in to ruin his coronation.”

"Let me stop you here," Tony interrupted and sat forward, "I know most of this already. What i’m dying to know is: how did you let the bastards in. Isn’t there some all seeing eye or something?"

Loki scoffed and shook his head. “Two eyes, in fact. Heimdall can see all paths in and out of Asgard. Or so he would  _like_  to think.”

Tony made the appropriate sounds of appreciation and grinned, gesturing for Loki to continue.

"It is no easy task to create a way into the realm under his watchful eyes. But I had found several on my own, and crafted others afterwards. I chose an easy path for the giants, since I wanted them to be discovered. This meant their means of arrival was to be found as well."

Loki leaned forward and drew a golden line in the air, connecting two circles together. He then traced seven more lines from different points on the original path.

"The trick is to begin where everyone else does, and steer off as you move closer. I started from where the Bifrost opened on Jotunheim, and followed the same trail more than half of the way there. Then, just as our arrival would be noticed," Loki slid his finger down one of the secondary paths with a quick jerk, "we disappear. But see how that one was the closest to our destination?"

Tony nodded, his eyes following Loki’s fingers.

"That was an older path, forged by someone long ago. It was also the most obvious to find, once we were inside."

"You clever little shit. I’m using you as my GPS from now on."

"Gee Pea Ess?"

"Global Positioning System," Tony recited, "basically, you show me how to get there with the quickest, most sneaky ass way there is. You know, something you’re good at."

"Or I could continue to transport you instantly?"

Tony nodded and agreed, “there’s that, true. Anyway, go on. You let some giants in, they wreaked some good ol’ havoc, Thor got his tights in a knot and decided to kick some Blue Man Group ass, you—”

"Found out I was one of them, and nearly lost the rest of my mind?"

Tony’s smirk fell instantly from his face and he fell back against the couch’s arm once more, looking thoroughly put out.

"My apologies, my heart, but things will not be as amusing from here on out."

Stark gave him a pointed look and waited for him to go on.

Loki took a deep breath and began again, “I was always the one called the liar, the cheat. Perhaps I was, but the greatest liar of us all was our good, old king. My ‘father’. It was a frightening surprise, finding out who I was. The monster that lurked in the children’s stories. The creature meant to teach the young Aesir to stay away from the forests, to be good, and above all… hate the Frost Giants. These were the stories I grew up with, and the same reason I even chose them as my tool to ruin the coronation. People feared them, so I chose to utilize that fear.”

Loki swallowed a lump that formed in his throat and began to pick at his sleeves. “To find out, not only that I was one of them, but that I was beloved by neither race… I felt more fear in that single moment than I ever had in my entire life. Odin had fallen into his sleep, I was a traitor to both my people, and I was suddenly, irreparably alone. I ascended the throne in a cloud of hatred from all sides. Thor’s warriors believed I fooled them all, somehow, to gain the throne. They left to bring the golden child home, assuming he would ‘fix’ what I had broken. Of course it was this way. If I ever felt undeserving of the throne before…” Loki let out a nasty laugh, “I felt it a thousand times stronger then. Again, a monster to rule the kingdom? Not a trickster, nor a less-loved younger brother. No, not the  _enemy_.”

"No one knew you were one of them, though. I mean, with the exception of sleepy-time Odin."

Loki nodded and looked up from his sleeves. “Do you truly think their hatred stemmed from a few simple pranks? No, I think they felt it somewhere in their hearts. Deep inside, the people around me knew I was a undesirable creature. Just like my children.”

There was a soft whimper from his lover that Loki did not wish to acknowledge. They had this argument before. Tony told him time and time again that he was not a monster. Loki still had trouble believing it, but he nodded and went silent each time as though he did.

"I know you do not believe I am a monster, but—"

“ _Excuse me_?” Tony interrupted with a snarl. “I do not ‘believe’ it? That’s not how this works, sweet-cheeks. It’s a god damn fact of life. You. Are not. A  _monster_. Do you look at Rodney and think, ‘oh, what a horrible creature’? You better not… because let me tell you, that’s a whole can of worms you don’t want to open.”

"I do not see how that is relevant? Your friend is mortal just as you are."

"That’s not the point…" Tony frowned and shucked off the blanket, looking irritated. "Fine, do you look at a bird and think, ‘Jesus Christ it’s horrible! Kill it! Kill the monster!’"

"Perhaps some of them."

"You’re just being obtuse, stop it. The point is, you’re not supposed to. It’s called difference species. It’s also called the matter of one’s personal disposition, which everyone in Asgard seems to lack any consideration of."

Loki rolled his eyes and sat back, letting the man go on. Once he started, it was usually impossible to stop.

"You hated me at first, right?"

"I wouldn’t say ‘hated’…"

"Shh," Tony hissed, but flashed a grin all the same. "You thought I was a stinky mortal who played in the mud. Admit it. Actually, don’t. My ego can’t handle it right now."  
Tony paused and started to tap a finger on his knee. “Why is this so hard to get through to you? All I can keep saying is that they were wrong. The stories, the mighty tales of battle against the beasts? They were wrong. Warning the lil’ baby royals to eat their peas, or the Frost Giants will get you? Wrong. Pumping up Thor into a rage by simply flashing a few blue skins around? _Wrong_.”

Loki flinched and looked away.

"Oh don’t," Tony grumbled, "you know it was wrong. You just said it, like, ten minutes ago. Don’t start sulking now."

"I am  _not_  sulking.”

"Sure, whatever. Sulk and listen, then. The Aesir, they’re a little too egotistical, even by my standards. You’re not above everyone else just because your castle is made of gold. Is your shit made of gold? No? Then shut up and get off your high horse, because then and  _only_ then should you even consider calling yourselves the ‘rulers’ of the nine whatsits.”

Loki choked back a laugh and looked at him. Tony was smiling, but his eyes were dark and serious. “Lokes, babe… please tell me you see my point? I think I lost it somewhere in all the ‘fight the power’.”

"I am wrong about being a monster because the Aesir do not produce golden excrement? Or perhaps you meant the part where liberties were taken with the stories of their culture and species?"

"Both," Stark quipped. "Also, you and I are different, yet neither of us are monsters. At least not in the physical sense. I’m pretty sure the ‘merchant of death’ is in a fairy tale or two already."

"Tony…"

He shook his head and leaned back again, giving Loki a ‘let’s not go into that’ look.

"I do see what you mean… actions do make a man, or a monster. But you must see how that only serves to prove my point further?"

"What, do you mean how you killed thirty people in your first few days on Earth? Or the other hundred or so after that?"

Loki paled at his words, unable to tear his eyes away from Tony. His lover was staring at him without an ounce of blame, but words fell heavily on Loki’s heart.

"I was… I was not well, at the time."

“ _I_ know that. Fury knows that. We all know you weren’t really Loki when that happened. Do  _you_?”

Loki swallowed and nodded a little. “I do,” he whispered, ” but I was myself when I killed an even larger number.”

The first hints of doubt crept into those amber eyes, and Loki was forced to look away once more. It was time. Time for the man, who had looked past so much already, to know the monster.

"I killed thousands of my own race when I turned the Bifrost into a weapon," Loki spoke in an emotionless voice, "I chose to do it with a clear mind and conscience. I decided to slaughter them for the simple matter of love."

"I wanted to reassure myself that I was loved by the people who raised me. I wanted Odin to see me smite his thousand year old enemies, and be proud of me. Like he would a son. Like he would if Thor had done it. But he did not see it that way. He told me…  _no_. That I was _wrong_.”

There was a huff of breath and a silence after that Loki could not interpret. He gritted his teeth and looked across the couch.

Tony was sitting with his legs drawn up to his chest in a mirror image of Loki. His arms were wrapped tightly around his legs and only his eyes showed above his knees.

“ _I’m sorry_ ,” he whispered.

Loki bit his tongue and shook his head, confused by his reaction.

"I’m sorry," Tony said louder.

"You did not do anything, why… why do you apologize?"

Stark unfolded again stiffly and crawled closer to him. Before Loki could react, the man pulled his legs apart and wrapped his arms around him in a warm embrace. Loki let out a surprised sob and clung to him, afraid that this might be the last time.

"I’m sorry to an entire race for forgiving you, because somehow… it doesn’t seem  _fair_. But I do. I forgive you for killing thousands. Does that… Does that make me a monster?”

Loki choked and buried his face into his lover’s hair, his shaking hands clinging to Stark’s shirt. After a few shuddering breaths, he managed to answer.

"No… no, you are not a monster. Perhaps an idiot, though."

"I’m your idiot."

"Are you?" Loki asked, leaning back to look anxiously over Stark’s face. "Are you mine?"

Tony smiled weakly. “Yeah, i’m your smelly, mud-flinging mortal. If you’ll have me.”

"I could ask for nothing more," Loki joked.

Tony’s smile grew warmer and he reached up to brush away the trail of tears from Loki’s cheeks.

"Well, there is one thing you could ask for."

Loki chuckled weakly and nuzzled his face back into Stark’s hair. “Oh? Do tell.”

Tony let the pause stretch before muttering into his ear, “you could shit gold.”


End file.
